I'm so so so, so over waiting

Do you want the good news or the bad news first?

We'll start with the good news :] Stephanie finally had her baby yesterday!! 7 pounds 9 ounces. She's a beautiful, healthy little girl. Mother and child are doing great! Jax makes a cute, protective daddy. :] Words can't even describe how happy I am for them.

Bad news is, I miscarried again... for the second time. :[ I don't know what's wrong with me... Somehow I doubt it's just coincidence that I lost two babies in a row. The doctors say that they wont do any tests until I lose one more. Idiots. So here I am after yet another pregnancy with empty arms and a broken heart. That was two weeks ago. As the title of this blog says, "im so so so, so over waiting" I'm so ready to be a mother. I'm so sick of waiting. I'm so sick of failure and disappointment. I'm so sick of death that no one else seems to recognize but me and my husband. and I'm sick of being patient.

I'm trying to change my attitude, I'm starting to get better, and submit myself to the lords will. But sometimes it's just so hard.

Some potentially good news is Nick's dad is recovering. He's had a few surgeries, and gets to keep his leg. He should be out of the hospital in a couple weeks. :]

That's all I have to say until next time.

Love you all!!!

Sara Jessen